Side Effects

Mountain bike mud in the back of our wagon--evidence of a winter well spent

After two punishing years with record-breaking snowfall, we’ve finally had a mild winter on the central Great Plains. Every roadie I know has been bragging about his or her winter mileage. Sure, it turns cold sometimes, but the bad weather lasts only a day or two before the sun returns and the south wind blows and you can get in a reasonably warm ride.

Like many other cyclists in these parts, I’ve been spending lots of time in the saddle, riding the local trails nearly every day. Things took a decided turn for the worse, though, after a long ride last weekend. At first I thought it had something to do with the trail’s difficulty, but my condition continued to deteriorate until finally, on Thursday, the doctor’s office diagnosed a sinus infection. Two prescriptions later (antibiotic and steroid), and I am beginning to feel human again–from the neck up. From the neck down, it’s a continuing battle.

Today the sun blazed away in another beautiful day, more like late March than February. I wanted badly to ride in the fresh air after three days of napping and watching old movies, but I was still fatigued, had a headache (going on about two days now), and a sore neck. Strangely, I felt fine in every other way. So I picked up the prescription fact sheets and read that the possible side effects were exactly the symptoms I was having–ironically, nearly the same symptoms of the pre-medication sinus infection. “Contact your doctor immediately,” the instructions read. I considered my doctor’s response in similar previous situations and decided she would tell me to get on the bike.

It was not one of my better rides. My head ached, I still had no energy, and I panted like an overheated dog for the entire half-hour. I thought about lying in the grass for awhile on a sunny slope, but rumor has it the ticks have survived the mild winter. Funny thing is, the headache was gone by the end of the ride. My friend Anita has wondered how you can feel so terrible on a bike that you think you’ll fall over and die, then just a few minutes later you feel fine. It’s cycling little miracle.

I’ll call the doctor tomorrow. Today, I’m good.

Adamo and Eve

Behold, the ISM Adamo tri saddle.

In the beginning, there were wooden bicycle seats. Then man discovered rubber. And he padded a metal seat with rubber to soften the ride. And it was good.

Then man created plastics. He invented spandex, vinyl, carbon fiber, gel-foam, and other materials that promised better riding through chemicals. Man applied the chemicals to the bicycle seat. He made the saddle narrower and the nose longer to help him ride faster. And man saw every thing that he had made, and, behold, it was very good.

But man did not want to ride alone. He told woman, Let’s ride together. And woman sat on the bicycle seat and asked, How do you stand this kick-in-the-soft-stuff? Man said, Suck it up princess. Woman said, Behold, this is not good. And man rode alone again.

And then someone–a woman, perhaps–created new bicycle seats with wider saddles and shorter noses and central grooves that are kind to soft parts. Because not everyone is the same. And woman does not like to be called a delicate flower, even if she is one.

And that is why this Eve has an Adamo seat that keeps her Genesis parts (a.k.a. “junk”) off the front. And it is good. It is very good.

The Woods in Winter

Greetings from the Topeka woods in mid-winter.

The trees wear their trunks like the faces of craggy old men. There’s ice on the pond, but no snow on the ground. Some days are stormy, but most are sunny and temperate. It’s been a great year to explore the woods on a mountain bike, taking time to smell the (sleeping) roses.

Gene Pool

Alzheimer’s disease floats in my gene pool. It’s the turd bobbing among the lily pads (blue eyes and long legs). Each time I forget an appointment or misplace my keys, I wonder if I should be selecting an assisted living facility while I can still make decisions.

Last week I had to give three media interviews on the same day for work. The first early morning appearance went fine, but I stuttered during the second one. For a moment I couldn’t figure out how to end a sentence. Lunchtime fell between the second and third interviews, so I hopped on the new mountain bike and rode to clear the brain clog. For about 30 minutes, my state of awareness was super-charged. You can’t ride mountain bike trails with a disengaged mind, at least not when you’re a beginner, because you’re going to hit something nasty. Rapid synaptic firing is the order of the moment:

Tree root coming up fast. Yeah, attack it. Hell, there’s a bigger one on the other side. Be aggressive, you can do it. Okay, that’s done. Uh-oh, rock. KILLER ROCK! Hard turn. Tree. No, two trees close together. Too close for the handlebars. Laugh. Hop off the bike and jog.

And that’s the internal yelping for only about five seconds. Imagine what it’s like over the course of a half-hour. This is your brain on mountain biking: a kick ass, red hot, hard firing engine.

The cerebral cortex atrophies just as surely as muscles without exercise. There is strong evidence to indicate physical exertion can stave off a genetic predisposition to Alzheimer’s. According to the director of Mayo Clinic’s Alzheimer’s Research Center, “Regular physical exercise is probably the best means we have of preventing Alzheimer’s disease today, better than medications, better than intellectual activity, better than supplements and diet.” It’s stunning how many diseases and conditions can be improved or controlled by exercise, yet only a small percentage of the population engages in it. There’s no question that exercise is saving my body, my sanity, and my mind. So maybe I don’t need to choose that retirement apartment just yet.

Oh, and that third interview of the day? Nailed it.